For the record

"Occasionally the child, too, is a pleasure, though mostly she is a joy, which means in fact she gives us not much pleasure at all, but rather that strange admixture of terror, pain, and delight that I have come to recognize as joy, and now must find some way to live with daily. This is a new problem." Zadie Smith (source : http://www.nybooks.com/articles/archives/2013/jan/10/joy/)